Bad jokes

#207

Heres an excersise program for old people.
You start with the 5 pound potato bag. You lift it up and down for a few minutes several times a day. When you feel ready, you move up to the 10 pound bag, then the 15, 20… Eventually you’ll be at the 50 pound bag.
Then you start putting potatoes in the bags

#208

:rofl:

#209

what do you call it when a sex worker farts?

a prostitoot

#210
What do you call someone who isn't funny?

Ilikzerice

#211

Search up “Site C Dam”

Site C Dam is going to cause a lot of damage

#212

If a girl says she will be ready in 5 minutes, she will.

#213
How do you persuade somebody to pick up the pen you dropped on the floor?"

Threaten their life

I know, even for bad joke standards this is bad, but I thought of one off the top of my head so… forgive me ples

#214

thats not even a joke, more like an anti joke

#215

Exactly.

#216

I slipped on black ice today.
I thought it was just regular ice, but when I got up I realized my wallet was gone.

#217

jea
jea.jpg1069x631 471 KB

#218
What's the best way to get by in school?

Study

Anti joke ^

Real jokes v

Why can't Mexicans win the Olympics?

Everyone that can run jump or swim is already past the border

Why are black people so good at basketball?

The entire game is about running, jumping, and stealing.

#219

Two PPE knights together make me sad T-T

#220

So, for those who play in some orchestra, you’d know that the violas are quite abused with many jokes about them. May as well post em here.

What's the difference between a viola and a trampoline?

You take your shoes off when you jump on a trampoline.

What's the difference between the principal violist and the last violist?

About one and a half measures

And then perhaps a few disturbing baby jokes. They are a bit extreme, so you’be been warned.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini?

I don’t have a Lamborghini in my garage.

What's the difference between a baby and a fish?

You gut a fish after killing it.

One more joke that’s more uplifting, though quite bad, even by bad joke standards:

So when we talk about cubic stuff in math, we say one cubed, two cubed, etc. Except for four, it’s quite insulting. (Hint: say four cubed in your head)

#221

i dont get it

#222

Multiply 3 by 23 in your head and you get a mental orgasm.

#223

I guess it sounds like f*ck you

#224

huh

after my wife died, i couldn’t look at other women for 20 years.
but after i got out of prison, it was totally worth it

#225

Yeah I didn’t get it either

#226

Not exactly sure, but I think it is if you say four and cu (first part of cubed that gives the ‘q’ sound) really quickly, it sounds like f*ck you.