well then the wedding AND reception sucked
Bad jokes
Oscar Wilde was a witty ass poet.
Enjoy some of his quotes.
- Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
- True friends stab you in the front.
- When I was young I thought that money was the most important thing in life; now that I am old I know that it is.
- A manâs face is his autobiography. A womanâs face is her work of fiction.
Yesterday my 10 year old daughter killed a butterfly in the park. To teach her a lesson i said âjust for that you dont get any butter for a monthâ . Today she killed a cockroach in the kitchen. I said ânice tryâ
Suzie walks into the living room where her Daddy is watchin TV on a Friday night.
Suzie: "DadâŚcan I have the car tonight?"
Daddy: "Nah, I donât think so Suzie."
Suzie: "Oh, please DadâŚplease please pleaseâŚIâll do anything to get the car tonight. I want to go out with my friends SO bad."
Daddy: "Youâll do anything?"
Suzie: "Anything!"
Daddy: "Ok, wellâŚgive Daddy a little head and you can have the car."
Suzie thinks about it for a minute, but she wants to go out so bad, she decides to do it and starts sucking on Daddyâs pecker.
Suzie: "DAD! Your dick tastes like SHIT!"
Dad: âOh darn, thatâs rightâŚyour brother got the car tonight.â
theres nothing to explain its just that brother had the car and daddy probably pooped on his wang