[Forum Game] Keep the Cookie (merged)

#2117

i smash the computer.
my :cookie:

#2118

Since you guys must be moving so fast to get so far away, special relativity says that you are all very small. I hire an alien to step on you and take the cookie
my :cookie:

#2119

I hired the alien before you. He also steps on you
No ones :cookie:

#2120

I pick up the cookie and put it in a :gift:
now you cant open it until Christmas :christmas_tree:

my :cookie:

#2121

I was not moving at the speed of light so I am larger than the alien. He can only step on my foot, in which chase I laugh and punch it to death. Therefore, I never lost the cookie
my :cookie:

#2122

I use a decoy to distract you and steal the cookie for my paladin. My :cookie:

#2123

I disguise as Santa and you thusly give me the cookie.

My :cookie:

#2124

I ask for a cookie for christmas and the real santa takes it from you and gives it to me.
My :cookie:

#2125

I am the real santa, I give you a fake cookie
my :cookie:

#2126

As I huddle in the side of a back alley, I spectate all that goes on here. I see the murders, the theft, the explosions over who has the real cookie. Even the most upright of realmeye civilians, yes, even those of the highest council of moderators, have fallen over in greed or this small chocolate-chip delight. As Chrismas draws near, I find myself… drifting off… to sleep…

…As I dream, I dream of a world coated with doughy fields, Where sugar is mass- excavated from quarries, then caremelised over a great open fire, and brought into the temple of cookie. I hurry to the quarry, eager to begin praises to the cookie. I have no pickaxe. I hit the dough with my hands, tearing it apart for some substance to caramelise. All I find, is dust. I ask around, pleading to borrow other’s sugar, but none i given to me. I jump into the open fire, desparate to catch some of the sugar as is caramelises, but it slips through my fingers before I can stop it.

I enter the temple, with no sacriface for the cookie. I am accused a heritic; nobody listens to my cry of innocence. As I wake up…
I realise…
this cookie, that everyone is after…
can never be…
my cookie.

#2127

I read this entire post, which pleases the cookie gods. They grant me the real cookie.

My :cookie:

#2128

Gods are fake
My :cookie:

#2129

I go back in time 10 trillion years, make the first cookie and mass produce them.

Everyone’s :cookie:

But mostly my :cookie:

#2130

I pull a genghis khan, and as I do so I steal all the cookies and destroy them, except for my indestructible cookie.
My :cookie:

#2131

I shoot you
My :cookie:

#2132

You shot me in the shoulder, i run and cower heroically in my bunker.
My :cookie:

#2133

Your bunker has a nuclear warhead dropped on it, killing you. I take the cookie from your corpse.

My :cookie:

#2134

The cookie is very unstable and irradiated from the nuke, and you get very sick. I use a Rad-Away on the cookie and take it from you while you aren’t looking.
My :cookie:.

#2135

I enter as a new character and steal the cookie during my invincibility period.
My :cookie:

#2136

I shoot you again
My :cookie: